Happily humble

Ironically, I learnt a valuable lesson about valuing nothing, today.

I came home and just figured I was a messy bitch before I left the house this morning and why was my crap all out of place. I quickly realised I wasn't as messy as I'd thought (today anyway) and that my house had been robbed. Five laptops, two mine - gone.

My first thought - I'm going to be late to dinner. My second thought - I hope they didn't lay on my bed. My third thought - those pricks took my charger...fuck.

I have always had a skewed perception of valuables.

When my first car was stolen back in 2008, I was most disappointed about my $15 dollar pair of silver sandals that went with everything. They had been under the front seat. Other than that, I was kind of relieved - it was due for a clean and that was a job for the whole weekend. Dodged that bullet.

My mum once grounded me because I accidentally threw away a gold bracelet she'd given me for Christmas, and she'd intercepted it in the garbage before it made it to the big bins. I'd never seen it before in my life.

I've never had a dress or a pair of shoes that I truly cared about spilling stuff on and my car is almost literally a piece of shit.

I don't take photos - all my memories are stored up here (points to head). Mum asks me what I want her to leave me when she dies, but I can't really think of anything.

My top five most valuable things are as follows:

1. An old rusted birdcage with a music box in it that no longer works but used to sing "Yellow
Bird"

2. A Christmas card that my boyfriend made me with a pop up Santa smoking a cigarette and giving me the finger.

3. A small silver slinkie that I once found in the middle of my parents' living room proving
 to me that we can get anything we visualise. (There's a back story, but that's for another day.)

 4. My I heart New York mug that's as big as my head.



5. My juggling balls of which my brother lost one and I'm yet to make him pay.

If any of that stuff got stolen I'd be unhappy, but I'd get by. Look, I'm writing this on my phone and my hand is cold and numb now but what I'm trying to say is, no one can steal from you if you have nothing, or, more profoundly, everything you need you already have. Except my phone. If those f*ckers took my phone I'd be pissed.


Excuse any spelling mistakes!